Thursday, January 27, 2005


I must issue a disclaimer before I begin this rant. I love my boyfriend. He is wonderful, and a great fuck. He's becoming more and more open-minded and he's a lot less uptight about sex than he used to be. Most of this no longer applies to him in the least. I guess he just needed a good teacher. :)

Maybe I should do some explaining. At first, D was adamant about not wanting to lose his virginity until he got married. As you can probably tell from my recent posts, he's softened his position on that somewhat. Okay, a lot. But he's revealed at the same time his complete and utter ignorance of basic sexuality. I think it's because he went to a Catholic high school, and emerged typically repressed and misinformed.

Perhaps I should enumerate:

1) The day after we had sex for the first time, we were talking on MSN and he admitted he knew nothing about birth control. I had to explain the function and usage of condoms, the pill, and coitus interruptus (the method we had used the night before; risky, I know.)

Him: Isn't the pill bad?

Me: What? No. It's totally safe. What makes you think it's bad?

Him: I don't know. They told us it was bad.

Me: Of course they did. *rolls eyes*

2) I had to explain STDs. He didn't even know what the acronym meant, and when I told him, he asked if they occur spontaneously (as a sort of byproduct) or if one partner actually has to have one to spread it to the other. Christ. No wonder the guy was afraid to have sex.

3) He hates blowjobs. Now, I don't know if this quite belongs in this list of sexual ignorance, but I think it's a symptom of a larger problem. This topic deserves (and will get ) a post all of it's own, cause it just really disturbs me.

4) He has no clue where my clit is. Now this is not strictly true. He has an innate sense of what I like and where I like to be touched, but show him a female anatomy diagram (sans labels, of course) and ask him to point it out and he would be up shit creek without a paddle.

5) He was under the impression that during a woman's period is when she is most fertile. Huh? Where does this notion come from?

6) I know most guys have a horror of all things menstrual, but I'm reasonably sure most of them have an idea what all those pads and tampons are for. Him? Not a clue. I won't tell you what he thought they were for, because it is just too ridiculous for words.

This is nothing against him. This is against the society that can produce ignorance like this. For chrissakes, keep health class in school. Don't let uptight parents and cheap school boards limit or ban sex education. Obviously, even what we have in some schools is inadequate.

Has anyone else ever met someone similarily clueless in this department? Inquiring minds want to know.


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